What I Learned Playing in Bands for Over 15 Years

Guitars, Music
June 1, 2025

What I Learned Playing in Bands for Over 15 Years

By Kristian

Being a musician isn’t all about the concerts, fame, partying and attention, there’s a lot more going on behind the scenes that many don’t see. When you get to the higher levels in the music scene, it becomes very much like a business with many moving parts, except you have a group of individuals making the decisions and working together to execute plans. My journey has covered everything from playing locally in the suburbs of Melbourne to playing in over 60 countries worldwide. I’ve learned to navigate the world of music and performing with other people, and here are some of the lessons I’ve learned along the way.

Talent is Important, but Nothing Trumps Hard Work

I’ve seen many talented musicians and bands come and go throughout the years. The world is full of talented players, but they are not always the ones who make it to the top. I wouldn’t consider myself talented at all, but what I can say is that I enjoyed playing the drums and I persisted over a very long period; this is what contributed to my success. The same goes for any industry in the world; talent can get you noticed for a short period, but what is number one is work ethic and reliability.

If you want to last in the music industry, there are some things that you need to prioritise and stop focusing on talent. I would recommend fostering characteristics that make you dependable so others can trust you to get the task done. Because someone who is prepared ahead of schedule, always on time and has the right attitude. These characteristics will get you further than talent ever could.

Leave Your Ego at the Door

This is important for individuals, no matter what you’re doing in life, having a massive ego usually gets in the way. But for bands, it’s a killer, and I’ve seen it ruin relationships too many times. Being in the limelight or seeing some temporary success can inflate egos very easily. While everyone has disagreements, it’s important not to be too stubborn and leave your ego at the door. It’s way too common for bands to break up because someone had to be in complete control, or only focused on themselves, rather than seeing the bigger picture.

Some of the best bands that I know work together and are very collaborative, where everyone has an equal stake and no one is above music and their obligation to their fans. This is the kind of relationship that everyone needs to have when playing in a band. Just because you have some success doesn’t mean you’re a rock star; you still need to work just as hard as you did at the beginning and treat everyone well. Your fame can just as easily disappear as fast as it came to you, so stay humble.

Communication Is Everything

Just like in close relationships or business relationships, communication is everything; the smallest issue can blow up and cause bands to break up simply due to misunderstandings. There might be an issue, but if someone doesn’t voice their problems, missed texts might turn into missed opportunities. Through my time playing in bands, I’ve learned that clear and honest communication is the only way to go. Make sure you have those discussions, even if they might seem awkward at the time, it can save friendships, bands and relationships in the long run.

If there are disagreements, the best way I’ve found to deal with them is to get everyone together when things have cooled down and have a level-headed discussion. This kind of open communication is key in fostering better relationships and stronger ties with band members. Encourage regular discussions about expectations, money, schedules and goals early.

Practice is Where the Real Work Happens

Everyone sees the final product when they’re looking at you onstage, they see the short time you’ve blown up and become well-known, they see the incredible tour package. But what they don’t see is the hours of blood, sweat, and tears you’ve not only put into your craft but also all the hours you’ve put into rehearsing and writing music or recording with your band. The best bands that I’ve seen have been relentless behind the scenes and don’t show a lot of this work, most people only see the final product.

If you want to become successful when playing in a band, you need to take practice seriously. The competition is stiff in the music scene, and you want to have every advantage that you can get because the ones who put the appropriate amount of work into playing music will reap the rewards in the long term. There is no hiding the work, and whether you put in the practice or not, it is going to show when you hit the stage.

Be Prepared for Setbacks

Just like in business, you’re going to face issues and setbacks, whether that be venues not paying you on time, no one coming to shows, or releases being delayed. Issues like this can be quite common in the music scene because generally artistic individuals are a little more loose with deadlines and not as organised. Also, you can’t predict the market. Maybe the album you thought was going to be a hit isn’t successful, but another less polished track makes it into the top 100; you just need to roll with the punches.

The most successful bands that I have seen have been the ones that persevere no matter what life throws at them. They’re the ones who stay together for the longest period, whether or not they have talent. Usually, with time in the game, they refine their skills and find their lane. Also, there are bands I remember growing up and idolising, but had very short careers. Yes, they had talent, but they didn’t work through the setbacks.

Treat Music like a Business

Just because you consider music an art form, like dance or poetry, it doesn’t mean that there isn’t a business element to it, and if you want to sustain your band or project, you need to treat it like a business. This means managing your finances, being professional and providing products and performances that are worth paying for, everything is a value exchange. While it’s fine to take some losses when you’re starting, I see too many bands not realise their worth and undercharge when performing.

These days, labels are not the be-all and end-all when it comes to the music business. It is more than likely that you’ll be doing things yourself from a business sense, so best to learn these kinds of things early. Understand marketing, sales, tracking expenses and budgeting because using these things can not only make your band more sustainable but also ensure that you’re constantly evolving and able to improve once you get larger budgets.

Years on the road, countless shows, and moments like this that shaped everything.

Ensure You Have the Right Chemistry

Having the right chemistry in the music industry is incredibly important; all of the best bands and teams that I know have great chemistry together. If bands don’t have the right chemistry, they either don’t become successful or they end up breaking up. When the band does have good chemistry, everything becomes smooth, there are fewer negative interactions, the music they write is great, and they also play live with ease; everything levels up.

This is something that cannot be learned or taught; some of it can be luck, but the main thing is to find members who are on the same page as you. They need to have the same goals, ideas and personality, because, in the end, you’re working as a singular unit. And when you do find members that click and have that chemistry, don’t waste it and protect it because it doesn’t come around often.

Adaptability Is a Superpower

I’ve been in many situations in my life where I’ve had to adapt to different circumstances as a musician, and without a doubt, this has gotten me to where I am today. I’m traditionally a drummer, but my first Australia-wide tour was done as a bass guitarist. This is because I saw an opportunity to join a successful band, and even though it wasn’t my instrument, I knew that it would be beneficial for my career. This is the power of adaptability.

There are also other ways that we will need to adapt as musicians, whether that be through genre changes, lineup changes or even through gear issues that can happen mid-set. You will need to always be ready for a variety of scenarios when you’re playing as a musician. Just make sure you don’t panic, because the show must always go on, so be adaptable.

Cherish Your Friendships

The most important thing about being a musician is the connections that you will foster with other people, and some of my best friendships have come from music. These are the things that stick, the crazy stories, the late night, going through hard times together is remarkably unique and cannot be replicated. My life being a musician has brought some interesting people into my life that I still keep in touch with and will never forget.

That being said, many people start bands, and they might become close, but not many think about friendships and keeping them alive. While it might feel like work at times, cherishing the relationships with others and being grateful can keep things stronger in the long run. If you’re in a band and years down the line you lose your friendships and break up, then what was the point of it anyway?

Don’t Choose A Career in Music if You Want Money

I think this goes without saying that there isn’t a bucket load of cash for musicians, while some can make money, I wouldn’t choose this career if money is your motivation. You need to be solely motivated by the process and the art, or else you won’t succeed. I know of some high-profile bands that rarely make a wage high enough to support themselves, and this is no exaggeration. My musical journey has been almost constant investments of my time and money into projects that I’ve joined as a musician, and this is because I love what I do, nothing more.

But the thing is that if you follow your passion, you’re more motivated to work, and at a certain point, you can reach financial independence as a musician if you make the right moves. But if it’s your sole purpose, you won’t last, and you’re better off starting a business or other job in another industry.

These are the 10 important lessons I’ve learned as a touring musician for over 15 years, and lots of these lessons have served me in my own life. While they are typically directed at careers for musicians, they can be applied to life in general because many of these lessons are relatable to different fields. I know that when I’ve engaged in other endeavours, I’ve applied these same learning and principles to different areas of my life and had great success. So even though the music career can be rough, over time, I’ve seen that it’s worth it.